Saturday, May 8, 2010

Making new friends everyday and everywhere

The world is like a mirror, you see? Smile, and your friends smile back. –Japanese Zen saying

My heart is filled to the brim today. We were out an about running errands and going on little dates. I had a date with the boys. We met with Holden's supervising teacher. Then the the boys had a date with their daddy. And then I went off on my own adventure. I met a lovely young woman named, Daniel from Israel. She had long black hair, kind eyes, and small seashells in her hair. She works at a place that sells beauty products. I really wanted to buy what she was selling, but I was in search of a new bathing suit, so off I went. It was fun to listen to her sales pitch anyway.

“Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.” --Tennessee Williams American playwright. 1911-1983)

And the boys and I had a server named, Sixto on our date. We asked him about his unusual name and he said it was also his father's name and it means sixth child. He was a first born though. He looked Hawaiian and he was a big guy. When we finished eating, and the boys were ready to go I said we needed a box for their leftovers (they still eat like birds). We waited a bit for Sixto to come around again so we could ask him for a box. Camden must have been excited to go because he stood up on our booth bench, made eye contact with our server from the other side of the room, smiled and joyfully announced: "Sixto, we need a box." "It caught me by surprise and I started to laugh. Startled Camden, buried his head into my arm and I told him how cool he is. Sixto said, "O.k." and we had our box in a few seconds. It was one of the best times I had had with them in a long time. They both discussed their meal choices, side by side, and told me they picked those items so they could share. They told Sixto that and he smiled and said, "It is nice to share."

"You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you." -Dale Carnegie

Story 2: We went to the bank to get some papers notarized. We had to wait a long time for a banker since it was the noon hour. Both boys went into the cubical with me when it was our turn. It was an older woman who helped us. She was very jolly. Most people I meet are really nice, not sure why that is. Anyway, she found out a little about us and she went on and on about all the cool things we will see this summer in Alaska. She went there on a cruise 2 years ago and her face lit up when she spoke about it. She hoped we could see whales, and moose, and elk. She and Holden could have talked for another half an hour about all the things they have seen and all the adventures we will have or have had. It was if we were not in a bank, with people waiting in line behind us. I had to gently pinch Holden's back to hint it was time to go. Camden was half way out the door. It was like pulling teeth to break Holden and the banker's intent gaze and excitement.

"Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer."

Story 3: Holden has been learning to play Halo 3 this week with a new friend, Ben. I put a note on an unschooling_gamers group about wanting more friends and Ben's mom wrote to us. They only live 6 hours away and they both love WoW and Xbox 360. They have been playing a lot this week and really clicking. Ben is 10 and he has been a lot of fun for Holden to get to know. I had fun talking to his mom on the phone about various things our boys have in common. We hope to meet Ben and his family one day in the future.

"Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?" -Abraham Lincoln

Story 4: "Camden and the toy frog." We went to Dollar General to pick up some supplies this week and for Camden to spend some of his money. He had been asking to buy something with his money for a few days. So finally we had a chance and off we went. I grabbed my two things I needed and then he we got in line with a toy car he wanted. When the cashier rung up his car a message came up letting the cashier know it was recalled, so they couldn't sell it to us. I told her that was the second time that has happened to us recently. Camden didn't freak out or anything and I told him he could save his money. He just said he would go pick out another item while I paid for mine. I tried to talk him out of another toy, so I whispered something in his ear. Instead he ran off on his mission. He came back and patiently stood in line behind a nice lady who had apparently been watching us. She said she liked his attitude so much that she wanted to buy the toy frog he went to pick out so he could save his money. I was surprised he was o.k. with that and I allowed it to happen. I let the transaction happen and did not intervene.

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words." -Unknown

I think the thing that people like the most about my kids is how the talk openly and make eye contact. They are also happy and social. I have been taking them with me everywhere with me their whole lives, so they know how to interact with all age levels, opposite sex, and other races-- without fear or prejudice. I don't pay for a sitter everytime I have an appointment; they come with me. They are also friendly with the neighbors and say hello to them using their first name. The neighbors know them as brave and confident. A neighbor lost an expensive frisbee up in our tree and they were all too scared to climb the tree (even the two 19 year olds). They knocked on our door to ask Holden (8) and he gladly tried to help. But it was in a branch no one could reach. So then Holden tried to knock it down from our roof with a tennis ball. That didn't work either, but I thought it was sweet of him to try.

Life is full of sweet surprises everywhere...."The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart."

Heather ♥

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