"Daddy, calm down. Listen to me."

A cute story from today:
Holden (4 3/4 years) has been using couch and chair cushions over the past few weeks to make forts in the basement. The other day he brought some cushions down to the basement and then never played in the fort. Cliff picked up all the cushions afterward and said no more bringing cushions down from upstairs. We have a couch in the basement with lots of cushions; that should be enough we guessed. So today Cliff and I were talking upstairs and noticed he was removing a large cushion from a chair that matches the basement couch. I jumped in and reminded him we asked him not to take any more cushions downstairs. He continued to take the cushion off the chair. Cliff started in reminding Holden about not taking the cushions to the basement. Holden couldn't get a word in edgewise, although he tried. He didn't get discouraged and kept trying to explain what he was doing. Finally, in a loud, firm, and calm voice he said, "Daddy calm down. LISTEN to me. This cushion does not belong to this chair. See it doesn't have pen markings on it and the one that belongs here does." Cliff and I smiled at each other after he got our attention. After he was able to explain what he was doing we laughed and said, "Yes, you're right! Sorry." This is typical Holden behavior! He can't be only 4?

The other day after Cliff and Holden went grocery shopping Holden took the bag of catfood to the basement without being asked and emptied it into the cat's bucket of food with lid. But if he doesn't want to do something he will just say so! I asked him to do something trivial today and he looked at me square in the eye and said casually he didn't want to. I didn't guilt him or nag him at that point. He had a right to say no. Normally he does what I ask of him because I ask nicely and I don't take advantage more than necessary.

There's no telling what will happen tomorrow! Cliff and I told Holden tonight how much fun he and Camden are! They really made us laugh a lot today.

Enjoying being a parent has a lot to do with a person's frame of mind. If one thinks it's not convenient or a child's feeling or thoughts are not important than that makes being a parent a struggle. And it makes being a child even more difficult than it already is. On days (or moments) when I am not a good parent I know it's because I am not seeing being a parent as something to be taken seriously or important. And there are times when I let myself have a down day and I take it easy like when I'm tired or just having a bad day. We all have those times. But overall (at least 50% or more) of the time I think we're doing alright!

Photo is of Holden at Walnut Woods today with one of his roasted marshmellows.